Rejection

I am a girl who is almost 28 years old and have never really dated, and I think that is because I have this since of fear of rejection. I have seen so many people hurt and scarred by this fear. I've seem them drown themselves in relationship after relationship just so they could feel loved. I've seen women who engross themselves in sex because they think that will bring them love. I've seen women, mainly myself, who drown themselves in romantic comedies and fantasies of that most incredible man that will come into their lives. I know that God has this most amazing God-filled man out there for me, and yet I continue to doubt that and lose myself in these stories that only end with heartache, mine. I think I've romanticized this relationship in my head that I know is doomed to fail, because it won't come true so I take the pressure off of reality and focus on imagination.

Why do I do this????? I don't know. I know God loves me and wants to see me happy and I think in order for this to happen I have to let go of my insecurities and doubts and trust in the one who holds my future in his hands.

I hold onto this job that I hate because I'm scared of what the real world will do to me if I leave. I fear that I will fail all those who love and inspire me. Wow it felt good to write that!!!! I'm scared of failure, as many of us are. So we let this fear engulf us into staying unhappy when in reality if we just let go and see where life leads us, we might actually be happy.

To end this blog I'm going to quote Beth Moore...

"The truth is, God uses change to change us. He doesn't use it to destroy us or to distract us but to coax us to the next level of character, experience, compassion, and destiny. I hate to display such a firm grasp of the obvious, but how will we ever change if everything around us stays the same? Or what will ever cause us to move on to the next place He has for us if something doesn't happen to change the way we feel about where we are? God is thoroughly committed to finishing the masterpiece He started in us (Philippians 1:6), and that process means one major thing: change.

I can't wait to see what changes God has in store for my life.