The words are not coming tonight, but I feel like I should blog. Ten months ago today God brought this wonderful man into my life. I am so lucky and blessed that God placed him at the right time and the right place. All of my life I wondered why God made me single for so long, and now I know it was worth the wait. I know single people don't want to read this blog because if I were single I wouldn't want to hear another story about how a girl found a guy. But my story is crazy. It took me 30 years to find someone and fall in love. 30 years of tears, lonelyness, jealousy, anger, and wonderful memories that I wouldn't have had if I met someone years ago. I thank God for that time because it grew me into the woman I am today. Without those years I wouldn't know how lucky and blessed I am. When Jason walked into my life ten months ago I remember his smile and being so nervous that apparently I told him to be quiet, (which is something we will argue about for a very long time.) Crazy what we remember.
If I am honest with myself, I never really thought I would fall in love. I thought maybe it was always a dream, but not reality. I feel like I might wake up someday and it was all a dream. But it's not. It's real. God brought a wonderful man into my life that makes me smile every day and when I am with him I am the woman I always wanted to be. His love for people and for Christ makes me strive to be better. Being in a relationship has already taught me so much about myself. I've learned that to be honest is the best key, don't hold things in. To laugh at ourselves because we are silly and say crazy things. To love each other is to love each others fears, struggles, tears, weaknesses, happiness, successes, clumsiness, and failures. Falling in love is a miracle from God. When I read about Jesus and His love for us it is the perfect example of how to love in a relationship. I always knew this and try every day to love like Jesus, but being in a relationship with Jason I have got to experience it in full. Like Jesus, Jason loves me despite my craziness and messed up world. He loves me for me and I love him for who is he. Our relationship is by far perfect, no ones is, and it has its struggles, but through it I'm already having fun watching us grow and getting to know him better everyday. He amazes me everyday because He loves like Jesus and trust me when they say "look at how your man treats his mom and the other women in his life." because if it is true then I'm lucky!!
I'm crying as I write this because I am so lucky and I'm realizing that a few years ago I was crying out to Jesus, why am I waiting? Why am I so lonely and sad? Why God why? I now know why. I wasn't ready and God knew that. His timing is perfect. His timing is not ours. His timing is His control. And I am so glad because his timing is proving to be way better than I could have dreamed. God took my dreams, and made them better. I can't wait to see what the future holds!!!